In a Beijing hotel lobby : "The lift is being fixed for
next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable."
In a Shanghai hotel elevator : "Please leave your values
at the front desk."
In a Hangzhou hotel : "The flattening of underwear with
pleasure is the job of the chambermaid."
In a Jilin hotel : "You are very invited to take advantage
of the chambermaid."
In a Wuxi dry cleaner : "Please drop your trousers here
for best results."
Outside a Tianjin clothing shop : "Order your summer suits
quick. Because of big rush we will execute customers in strict
rotation."
In a Xian tailor shop : "Ladies may have a fit upstairs."
In a Guilin hotel : "Because of impropriety of entertaining
guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that
the lobby be used for this purpose."
An ad by Kunming dentist : "Teeth extracted by the latest
methodists."
In a Hangzhou zoo : "Please do not feed animals. If you
have suitable food give it to the guard on duty."
From a karaoke bar song list in Suzhou : "I'd Like to
Teach the Wound to Sing; What Kind of Foot Am I."
In a Taiyuan bar : "Special cocktails for the ladies with
nuts."
Hainan airline ticket office : "We take your bags and
send them to all directions."
In a Huashan temple : "It is forbidden to enter a woman.
Even a foreigner if dressed as a man."
In a restaurant menu in Harbin : "Salad a firm's own make;
limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger;
beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion."
